Duck and Cover

Remember when I predicted Cold War: Part the Second? I was totally right.

"In 1992, Russia unilaterally ended flights by its strategic aircraft to distant military patrol areas. Unfortunately, our example was not followed by everyone," Mr Putin said, in an apparent reference to the US.

Translation: Why do you always have to ruin things for everyone else?

"If Russia feels as though they want to take some of these old aircraft out of mothballs and get them flying again, that's their decision," [state department spokesman Sean McCormack] told reporters.

Translation: Why do you always have to be like this? God.