For Cirque

OMG

Postmodern Essay Generator.

It's like every Christmas come at once.

God. I can't stop hitting refresh.

World's greatest comic concept: Bar-Toons. "One man. One pint glass. Unlimited napkins. No erasing."



The above really sums up the essence of drunk for me. NO YOURE DRUNK HAHA.

Dubious Consent

I have a new excuse for my political affiliations.

See? It's not my fault!

This is awkward, isn't it?

It's so hard to blog again after a long absence. You feel obligated to post something really awesome. Something that will make up for your neglect and make your 2.3 readers love you again. I struggled, I really did. "What do they want?" I mused. "Maybe...an excessively cute music video? An amusing yet shockingly true blog? An in depth analysis of why, precisely, I find it so disturbing to be unable to identify every soloist in "We Are the World?"

[On a side note, this is when I thought about writing a book titled "One Dozen Outlandish Lies, or, Twelve Reasons I Haven't Updated My Blog," but then I realized that if I could come up with those twelve reasons, I wouldn't be mulling/mulling/angsting in the first place.]

But finally, I have found the perfect post-worthy thing: here it is.

Read. Take your time. Really enjoy it. It's worth it.

A Few Memorable Lines From the Last Two Days

"What if he's bisexual?"
"I think if he's bisexual everyone wins."

And this morning's, which made me laugh so hard I snorted:

"We asked around and people are really on the fence about it. It could to either way."
"Oh, hon, there is no fence."
"There's just pasture?"
"There's just green, green pasture."
"...AKA the Hudson River Valley."

Apologies for the inside jokes, but they must be recorded for posterity.

Wow. Best Thing Ever.

I'm totally sick of the races by now, but this still made me laugh. Heh.