Brain Hurts

Dear Mr. Rushdie,

You absolute fucking bastard.

kisses,
P&G

You may have inferred from the above that I've finished The Satanic Verses. I finished it at about 8:30 last night, incredulously turned the last page, and said, "No, really? That's it? Really?"

I feel like I need to form a study group to help work out my unresolved issues with this book.

I mean, yes, in a sense the story did have to come to an end, as there sure weren't a whole lot of main characters alive by the last page. But but but! I need to know! Oh my god, the angst.

Here are the question that oozed their way out of my traumatized brain [spoilers ahoy!]:

1. Was Gabreel really an angel of God? Or was he an agent of Satan? Or was he just crazy?
2. Who was the narrator anyway?
3. What the fuck was with that whole pilgrimage bullshit with Ayesha? I hated her. What is its relationship to the larger narrative?
   
4. What is the nature of evil in this world? Related: where do humans fit in this moral universe?
5. Are there accepted answers to these questions, or is this one of those "choose your own adventure depending on how fucked up you are as a person" deals?
6. What is the value of salvation in this universe?
7. Would it be cheating to see what Wikipedia says about it?

I want to talk some of it out here, for my own peace of mind. You may wish to skip this babble for the sake of your sanity; I'm really just thinking out loud.

According to Wikipedia, satanic verses "is an expression coined by the historian Sir William Muir in reference to several verses allegedly interpolated into an early version of the Qur'an and later expunged." Okay, yes, we did see that, and hello heresy. Nice one, Rushdie! He later parallels the historic satanic verses to a verbal incident involving the characters, which is really quite elegantly done.

Now, if you assume the title is being used only in that limited definition, you arrive at the following conclusions: the narrator is god, Gabreel is an agent of god, Saludin is a manifestation of evil in the world, human beings are fairly fucked, and blind faith is the only hope of salvation, which is Everything.

You see why I don't like that interpretation? God is good, humans are fucked up seeds of evil, snoooore.

Option Two: the satanic verses refer to the story as a whole, and the narrator is satan. And that, of course, changes all the rest. If the narrator is satan, Gabreel is his agent, and Saladin manifests evil because of this contact, not in spite of it. Evil disguises itself as holy, and humans are easily fooled because the word of god that defines their holy is not really the word of god. Oh, didn't I mention that? In this interpretation, the Qur'an is the word of, um, satan. Sorry! If it makes you feel any better, other holy texts would be equally corrupt in this universe.

There are positives to each interpretation. Oddly, I think the second is more hopeful about the fundamental nature of mankind. If the first is true, then hell, we're all fucked, and since when is that news? The second is far more interesting to me, but the objections to it are numerous.

The interesting thing about this universe is, despite having a very clear overarching good/evil (no matter how you choose to interpret it), on a smaller scale, good and evil are very difficult to distinguish. Which is an interesting point in and of itself. Huh.

Okay, okay, I'm giving up for now.

Wait! Okay, maybe there is no god or satan, maybe there is just a deity who is neither good nor evil. In which case my earlier statement would be reversed: there is no overarching good/evil, good and evil are only established by the minutiae of humanity.

Oh my god, my brain is leaking out my ears. I love books like this. Mindfuck!